Death by Scarf (and other ways of dying)

Posted: January 25, 2007 in All and Sundry, Musings

Towards the end of last night’s episode of Grey Anatomy, Meredith addresses (in a voice-over) this question to the audience: “What would you do if you knew it was your last day on earth?”

Cliche question, yes. But still an interesting question to ask yourself just for kicks. Typically, you’d come up with a million things to do in your list. And it would be difficult to choose just one thing you should do. This is where the challenge lies–which among the things you’ve written in your “to do” list would you choose, and why?

Another interesting question to ask yourself when you’re bored would be: “If given a choice, how would you want to die” That is the question.

First answer? Death by Scarf. Now that’s a Diva way to die. Just like the way Isadora Duncan died. To die creating art is the most romantic if not tragic way to die. (For artists, I mean. )

But then, Isadora was Isadora Duncan. She was THE Diva of Modern Dance. And is even considered up to now the Mother of Modern Dance. I can’t think of a more fitting way for her to die the way she did. Isadora died dancing. Her scarf accidentally strangled her as it got caught in a wheel of a train, while she was performing in a train station. Morbid but funny. Just like the way Divas are. (Recall Bette Davis in Whatever Happened to Baby Jane.)

But! If you’re not Isadora, then your death would just be reduced as a “freak accident.” Tsk tsk… Not a good idea to die.

“Oh starry night this is how I want to die,” the persona in Anne Sexton’s poem The Starry Night says. He/she suggests yet still another Diva Death in the making:

“to die

into the rushing beast of the night/ sucked up by that great dragon/

to split/ from life with no flag/ no belly/ no cry”

Inspired by Van Gogh’s painting titled Starry Night , this poem makes you imagine how it is to die into that starry night Van Gogh created for us. Beautiful. Intense. Fast. There will be no pain, no goodbyes, no tears, and definitely no warning.

Still, only Divas can do that sort of death. Or did I mention RockStars? Someone like Jim Morrisson or Kurt Cobain. Legends of rock fucking roll? And if you’re not, then probably you might wanna consider just rethinking your options.

So how else would I want to die?

Simple. Back to my first wish when I was in highschool. During a drinking spree, my friends asked me the same drunken question and I told them that I’d want to die in a hit and run. It won’t be just any car. I’d want a payloader or a “pison” to ran me over slowly from my toes to my head until I’d be as flat as a cardboard.

“That’s a very cartoonish way of dying! Like looney toons characters!” One of my friends protested.

Oh yes. That’s precisely the point. I’d like to die looking like a funny cartoon character but not quite because I presume my intestines would be splattered all over the street, my brains too, and well, blood would be everywhere. So that would be a morbid sight.

But the pain would be excruciatingly slow yet beautiful. You’d be able to feel every single pain created by the wheels patiently moving up from your toes, to your legs, to your torso, until they reach your chest and you’d stare at them moving nearer towards your face. Then blackout. The last thing on your mind would be the image of two gargantuan wheels moving at a snail’s pace towards your head.

Just wheels would be fine. No faces of human beings you had relations or fights with. No emotions. Just pure pain.

Now that’s a Claire way to die. Divaaaaaaaah?

*picture from

  1. denciojuan says:

    morbid…totally bloody…

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