smoking sucks (but i can’t help it!!!)

Posted: August 7, 2006 in Rants

in his blog, hidden boy writes: “I’m back to smoking and it sucks. I don’t like my smoker-self much.

well, honey, you’re not the only one. *hugs*

but at least i don’t finish up a pack like a used to. yeah. i know, it’s a stupid justification for my going back to smoking. i smoke. period. and i hate it.

i hate being an occasional smoker (yah, i call myself that) because:
1. it suggests that i am very stressed and anxious
2. that i am stressed and anxious
3. that i am really really really stressed and anxious

enough said. i have often found myself worrying about a lot of things these days. the kind of worries that don’t necessarily have immediate answers, like:
1. what if?
2. what’s next?
3. am i gonna survive this?
4. what’s wrong with me?

but what i really dislike about smoking is the shortness of breath i experience every time i do stretching exercises in yoga or when simply climbing up the stairs.

oh well, we all have our own complaints. this is mine as of the moment. tomorrow, i hope things will clear up and i won’t be abusing my lungs anymore. *cross fingers* meanwhile, i wanna wallow in my anxiety in clouds of cigarette smoke.

  1. sam says:

    Well, to be or not to be. You know the ending. 😉

  2. sam says:

    Well, tobe or not tobe. You know the ending. 😉

  3. reefer says:

    that is the question! yes, i know. sigh…

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